Helping Your Senior Parents Downsize

It’s understandable that when it’s time for your senior parent to downsize and move, it’s one of the hardest things they’ll have to do…it’s hard for you too. In fact, it can be downright challenging, complicated and frustrating, especially if your folks have lived in the same place for years and years.

You’re asking them to leave “home” with all of its memories, treasures, photo books, and “stuff”.

As you begin to go through their home in order to downsize, you will be surprised at some of the things you’ll find that they can’t live without, but needs to go. For example..

One lady, whose husband had passed away several years previous to her downsizing move, couldn’t let go of his dentures.

In another lady’s home, her children came across a small box of little pieces of thread that she couldn’t dispose of, it was labeled: “Pieces of thread to large to throw away, but too small to do anything with”.

Yes, we might chuckle at these examples, but for the seniors involved, these are important items that they don’t want to be without.

To help you help your senior parents downsize without tears, fears and frustration, I’ve put together some ideas to help sort…

When it’s time to downsize:

1. Bring lots of patience with you! Keep in mind how difficult this is for your parents…think about how difficult it would be for you if you had to downsize.
2. Give yourself plenty of time and avoid trying to get it all done at one time if your situation allows it.
   1. Many senior adults won’t be able to tackle marathon downsizing, so try to accomplish one room at time, one day at a time.
3. Ask your senior as many yes or no questions as possible. The more discussion questions you ask, the more uncertainty and frustration are created.
   1. As an example, If there are several sets of bath towels, pick out 2 sets that are in good condition and say something like: “I’ve got the 2 sets of bath towels that are the nicest, does that look good to you?” Your senior can  answer yes or no and feel successful in making a decision (about a choice he/she didn’t have to make), and you can move on to the next thing.
4. If you know how much space her new place will have and what it can accomodate, you will be able to guide her in what she can take that will fit, and what she must downsize. This will help in deciding which furniture, how many dishes, how many knick knacks and treasures and even how many clothes.
5. If you are sorting into piles, eliminate the “we’ll decide later pile”, it’s much easier to be decisive and have “keep”, “dispose of”, “sell” and “donate” piles. It will save time and frustration.
6.  If your parent has a collection of figurines or something, have her choose her 2 or 3 very favorites to take with her. If it will help, you could offer to take pictures of the rest of the collection so she can continue to ejnoy her treasures.
7. A good rule of thumb is, if it’s stained, cracked, chipped, or is missing pieces, it’s discarded.

Why do it yourself?

More and more people have begun turning to senior move managers who are skilled and trained to help seniors in this particularly difficult task at a particularly difficult time of life. Move managers are experts in the field and can offer gentle, but realistic guidance, and they know how to work with seniors, which keeps the parent-child relationship intact and free from dispute.

We are Certified Senior Move Managers recognized by our National Association of Senior Move Managers, NASSM! We are committed to serving our seniors with a high standard of ethics, best business practices and continuing education to help make our client’s move a Smooth Transition.

Contact us to learn how we can help you and/or your family cope with a senior move anywhere in the Phoenix East Valley area. We would love to serve you.